.sincere prayers & trials.

.isn't it funny how suddenly your prayers become more heartfelt and more powerful?.

.at the ultrasound on wednesday, as i were watching our sweet little boy (still in shock) move around on the monitor, i noticed he was measuring small. 32 weeks it kept showing on the monitor, which did not surprise me at all, brooklynn measured 2 weeks small my entire pregnancy as well. just to make sure i was seeing the right thing i asked the tech, "baby is measuring small huh?" she said, yep. and asked me if brooklynn measured small as well and how big she was when i had her. 7 pounds 1 ounce.

.i went about thinking there is no way my doctor is going to induce me if this baby is measuring small. and began to worry. coming to texas was a HUGE step for me. it was away from friends and family and becoming totally reliable on my relationship with Andrew and with God. my mom and sister both told me their doors where totally open for me to go live while Andrew came to Texas. It was always an option in the back of my mind, but i didnt find it fair to Andrew and to Brooklynn. I figured Brooklynn should not be separated from her daddy that long, and I would feel horrible if Andrew missed the birth of his daughter (oh wait, SON).

.once i got into my room and was waiting for the doctor, i immediately felt a sense of calm when she walked in. i LOVE her, she is younger and sat down and said, tell me what your worried about, and what your needs are. and just let me talk. i explained that we are here while Andrew does an internship at USAA for 10 weeks. Andrew has 1 paid day a month to take off....so we really would like to be induced. also, i need my mom here to watch little b while i am in the hospital...she totally understood but also explained some things that she is "concerned" about from the ultrasound. 

.so he is measuring small. 2 weeks. no biggie....but his torso area is measuring even smaller.. like 3 weeks. this has her not worried yet, but just concerned and wants another ultrasound when i come back in 2 weeks. she said at this point, he is not really low percentile wise, but definitely something she is going to watch. she said at this point, we can plan to be induced, but really decide at my next apt. 

.this little man has already put a scare earlier at his 20 week ultrasound (you know, when they said it was a girl)...the tech kept looking at his heart...and than had another tech come in and look. she never said anything to me, but between the both of them they said, "yea, you can see it in motion, but i cant get a still frame of it." i didnt ask questions, just listened. as we drove home, i cried thinking how my baby could have heart problems. when they called, they said everything looked fine and the ultrasound looked great. we have kinda dismissed it from our minds, but always have the worry. 

.andrew and i the other night were talking about why we ended up in texas. we both know what each other was talking about. we know some of the best doctors are here, and we both think that if our little man is to have problems, he would be well taken care of here. obviously, its not something we want to talk about, or think about, but some of our peace has come from this. 

.i have noticed when we say family/couple prayer, how much our prayers has changed since wednesday's apt. we pray that baby boy gains some weight and grows healthy. the main reason i am posting about this, is because i need to get my feelings out, and i want to be able to look back and see this experience our family went through. also, because family and friends read my blog... and i am asking for prayers for our little baby e. we thank you in advance. 

.we rely completely on the Lord. we know He knows our needs/our wants/our concerns and wont give us any trial we can't accomplish. already, i have seen the blessing from this trial we are dealing with at this time in our lives. andrew and i have grown closer together. our family has grown closer together. we know we are doing all we can do on our side, and changing a few thing in our lives to help us become closer to God. we have started making it goal to STOP WHAT WE ARE DOING at 8:30 (sometimes 9) and read from the scriptures and say family prayer. even if brooklynn is running around. 

.we know this trial is only a small moment in our life. we are just trying to keep an open mind, and learn what we need to from it. we are so excited for our little family to grow, and to meet our little boy in 6 weeks or less. 

.here is b yesterday, chilling by the window with momma, waiting for daddy to get home from work.

.here is me pregnant with baby e at 34 weeks today.