.all i ask for anymore.

.my thoughts have been wandering alot lately (whats new). but today made me sit back and say, i am really in a good place. i have been whining about having a baby lately. i was REAL emotional about it about a week ago, and now have passed it. andrew and i have talked in depth, and it has been good for us. crazy that MY EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN was a blessing... we got close to one another, and it MADE us talk.

.today i attended a baby shower of a friend i have had since kindergarden. she is 7 months pregnant. where is her husband...off to training for the army. where is he going to be all of august.....training....where is he going to be 1 week after megan has their baby.....iraq. 

.i look at megan, and i see strength. but i also see a girl who is newlywed (been married about 1.5 years) and is going to give birth to Arom and her first baby, and than proceed to say goodbye to her husband, and send him across seas to iraq to fight for his wife, his baby, me, you, and the rest of america. 

.i heard this song, fell in love with the lyrics, and than watched the music video. i love it. not only does it make me think of megan, but also my life.... and how good i have it. today i was able to go out and get some jeans, and do some shopping with my girlfriend. i walk into my apartment that is BIGGER than kristina and dustin had WITH mia as a newborn. I have new furniture, nice table & chairs, kitchen set, bedset, bathroom, and an amazing husband. I am a spoiled newlywed, with a husband that works HARD in school. he knows my needs, and try to meet them. andrew's comment was, "when we have a baby... "I dont want you to have to work, i want you to be able to work at home, and be with the kid(s)."

.today seeing megan, she does have everything she wants, but come august she will be having a blessing of a newborn baby.... but she is also having to say goodbye to her husband. i am not trying to down on megan by any means... she has strength BEYOND belief. I was just put in my place, to realize how blessed i am.

Chorus of All I Ask for Anymore:

But when I bow my head tonight
There'll be no me myself and I
Just watch my wife and kids please lord
That's all I ask for any more

(Read ALL the lyrics, than watch the music video...link posted below)

All I Ask For Anymore Music Video

.weekend.

.this weekend has been LAZY but so so so enjoyable. saturday andrew and i pretty much spent almost our entire day on the couch. it was AWESOME. it was much needed for both of us, and we both needed to relax and just be together.

.i dont have much to blog about, i was currently waiting for pictures from my sister in law-heather's wedding. she looked beautiful and we had lots of fun with "girl talk" the night before her big day. again she looked stunning. the place was SO pretty where she was married. her friend got SOME pictures of the place, so i will post those. but what i LOVED was she had a photo booth that everyone had to go through before they could go see the bride and groom. it was an awesome idea and showed some personality of alot of people. i had so much fun, and was pretty much a photo booth hog, but whatever :)

.anyways. we are doing well, and just trying to be better in our relationship, and to each other. i have ALOT on my mind, and things i want, but more on that later. here are pictures of my BEAUTIFUL sister in law and a few of her wedding pictures. i will do a FULL post when she gets the real pictures from her photographer, but i will post pictures from her friend for now.

.update FINALLY.

.well we have moved. finally. we are here, and have been for 1 month. I have been working for one month. and i have been sick for 3 weeks. 

.so i dont really have much to tell you, our life is boring. but i decided i would blog about our trip. i had to say goodbye to my "loves" (kian and holly) on wednesday. it was SUPER hard but i had an AMAZING day planned out for us, and spent more money than i should of....but it was worth it. i took the kids ice skating. they have NEVER been before. i wish i had pictures to blog or videos. but the kirbys are holding them hostage, and KYLE is too busy watching truck DVR's and working on the landcruiser to send them to me. we continued to build a bear and i let the kids pick out their favorite one, and i put a personalized message in each one. they LOVED them. i have proof for this (thanks TAMMY!).

.so we loaded up ronnie's 1971 chevy impala on a trailer behind our 16 foot budget truck. and off 800+ miles we drove. a trip that USUALLY takes 12 hours took 15 because of our stops, and how slow we had to go. we got to utah, unloaded ronnie's car, loaded mine and the rest of the budget truck. and off to idaho we go. however. we were stopped when we blew a tire. OPPS! we called roadside assistance, and the guy couldnt find us.....1 hour later...he found us. 1.5 hours later we were on the road....got to rexburg. unloaded truck and car. in our apartment. sleep. call. hello- new roommate. one bedroom less than expected, but completely worth it. i love having janelle around for girl time and to talk. she is awesome. monday- interview with daycare. job-sealed. work. sick. work sick. work sick. work. sick. work. sick. yep. thats the life right now. we should have more pictures here soon from heather's weddding :) until than, love you all.

.holly and "wen" from build a bear.

.kian and "chris" from build a bear.

.tire we blew.

.another view of tire.

.me showing off tire.

.budget truck and me.

.view of the entire package going to idaho...look at bre, totally looking upset about blowing a tire.

we illegally sat WEDGED in the middle of a first aid kit and fire putter out thing that were NAILED TO THE GROUND. this is what chewy did the entire time.

.and i sat there too.

.and when chewy was sleeping... i got bored.

.i love having my own apartment, but i sure miss the green, the yellow, the house, 

i miss my washington home.

.apartment.

.need to get to bed, cause i have to be at the daycare tomorrow at 7:30 AM.

.so long story short, until i can sit down and type out a real update...here is our apartment we have worked so hard to get done. 

.this is for kian, cause he told me, and i quote, "you need to get a videocamera, and walk around, and show me your apartment so i get the hang of it, and see what is looks like"

.so here's to you kian (and others that follow my blog.

.the next step.

.i am currently writing this, listening to holly play her heart out with her new nanny. she LOVES her, and i think this transition is going to be a bit easier than we all anticipated. which is good. VERY good. i want holly and kian to learn about moving on with life, but also realize that life goes on. but of course know, that i love them like they are my own kids. i am not going to lie, seeing holly move on so easily is hard however. i didnt get my normal "TASHA!" hug this morning. no sitting on my lap, i didnt get a kiss from her, or wanting to play with me, its REALLY hard on me. but i need to think whats good for the kids, and right now, being able to be happy with thier new nanny is good. tomorrow is going to be hard, but hearing holly happy with her new nanny makes things ALOT easier. however, tomorrow is still going to bring tears, and its going to be rough, to let go of these guys. i love these kids SO much.